Solution: BE a Foreigner in the RP

It would always happen to me every morning: I stand at the sidewalk with my Sonic-the-Hedgehog-"I'm waiting" Stance while waiting for the bus which probably travels from Budapest then to Slovenia then down to Ayala and finally to my place. I have to wait 'til my hair turns gray. I have 30% of making it on time with the bus on the way to school and 70% of getting late for being stubborn about not wanting to ride a jeepney to school.
What was unusual with me today was that I was wearing a cap. So when I entered the gates of the University, the security guard stopped me. I thought he found a bomb inside my bag but luckily, he didn't. It was my cap. He told me to take it off and said that my hair was already too long.
I stopped for a while without caring about getting late or about the people entering behind me who were in traffic. I thought of John Nam, our Korean schoolmate.
No, I didn't thought of him because I'm one of his admirers!! I thought of his hair and I felt like arguing to that damned guard that JOHN HAS A LONGER HAIR THAN I DO SO WHY DO I KEEP ON SEEING HIM LIKE THAT FOR YEARS?!!!!
The smelly guard told me to go to the guardhouse where the other guards were (and the word GUARDS in this sentence is very numerous, isn't it?!). But I stopped when I was at the Main Door of the Campus. I thought of running in and not doing what the guard told me so. I was there for a little while thinking as if I knew how to think and as if I was really thinking.
I ran in and the guard ran after me and he pointed his gun at me and shouted, "HALT!!!" (Of course, this is just a translation. He can't possibly speak english which is the reason why he can't stop John from entering the campus with a great amount of dark hay on his head--wooops!! Don't let him read this or I'm dead meat!!!). But I kept on running, despite the long sentences in the closed-parenthesis above this sentence. So the guard pointed shot at me and I quit imagining such wild imagination.
So, I didn't run in and signed on the Violation Notebook. But of course, they didn't pay any attention to what I wrote so I used my talent on calligraphy--which by the way, I don't really now how to use. So if you were to see my name on the notebook, you'd probably think I was sleeping while signing on it. What Violation I wrote: LONG HAIR But of course, it is written on my normal penmanship so nobody could read it.
I wonder how many times John signed on that notebook (has he even ever done such?!!). Just because he's a foreigner and they can't speak in english fluently don't mean they would tolerate his violations!!! Hmmm... next time, I'll really tell them this even if they have to shoot me (wow!! Rizal mode!!!).
So maybe that's it. I just need to become a foreigner in the Philippines!!!