Summation 2007

Picture this: your professor made a deal that if you all scored well on the pre-final exam there would be no more final exam, the results of the pre-final exams were being announced by the class president, no low-score was heard yet, no professor in sight, everyone was cheering and we were all rejoicing. The last name ever to be announced was mine: “Garcia, 98 (percent)”.
Jokingly, Pau joined the hullabaloo as she stood up and cried unto me, “No way!!!”
Out of gladness, pride and joy, I also stood up and joined her clamor.
Then, came a loud shout, “WHAT ON EARTH--------?!!!” It was actually our professor, his arms akimbo and his face red with anger, standing at the door. That was actually his second shout; his first shout had been drowned by our cheers.
We all sat down feeling embarrassed, astonished, startled, stunned, shocked, taken aback, and nervous. We spent the next hour receiving his spits of disgust, the next days reviewing the whole book, the next meeting waiting for the final exam which failed to come with him, and the next week trying hard to apologize. Well, all I enjoyed in his subject was our trip in Laguna.
My 2007 started with a lot of hang outs with the Glamsterz (my peers) including the Pyro-Olympics at the Mall of Asia and our outing in Sea Breeze Resort. This proved that after all these years, our group stayed intact and solid (with exemption to one member---no big deal, my dear readers. Believe me). On the night (or the early morning) of the celebration of Aaron’s birthday, Mitch and I were strolling around the village drowned with our hopes and dreams (senti mode?!). We knew we still had a long way to go. SO we all cherished every moment together and looked forward for a better future.
On summer vacation, I applied for a job in One Global Contact Center, got the job, and rejected the schedule. I spent the next two months just taking care of my cell phone. But in the middle of the vacation, it stopped working while I was up to something (my secret for the time being---hahahaha).
So half of the year I spent with all the English Department could offer: requirements, home works, readings, exams, and did I mention requirements? I found at least some spare time to have ‘fun’ by joining the Korean English Proficiency Program. But having a very tough professor, whom I dubbed as Prof M, my life was kept from anything else but studying. We even had that “Holy Week” (September 2-8) when we had some sort of problem between her and the class.
As a treat for ourselves after the tiresome semester, we went to Star City to amuse ourselves and cry out all our worries as the rides swung us left to right, back and forth, and up and down.
Anne and I were forced to join Mr. and Ms. English 2007 during the English Week the next semester. We did not take it seriously so out of all the contestants, we were the most frivolous.
Here are just some more of what happened this year:
· A thief broke into our house (again)
· Cocktail Party in Philippine Women’s University (March 6)
· Accidentally entering the Ladies room (let’s pretend this is an important event this year—hehehe)
· Devirgnized…. I mean, my lungs got devirginized…
· Earthquake during class
· Overnights at Oso’s
· Compendium (one word explains it all, right classmates?)
I can’t list all of the events this year---just the major ones. So if I’m in the mood, I’d explain some of those mentioned above in my coming posts (pa-bitin effect??!)


It pisses me off when I’m already done with my evening shower then I would be asked to go out of the house to do something. It was one night when, after taking my sacred evening bath, I was asked to buy something in the store. I reluctantly obeyed—my mouth overflowing with evil mutters. I got dressed and walked in the streets with an evil look. I did not care how I looked like and what people would think of me because whenever I’m in a bad mood, I care less of how I look like or what I do. So the people I met in the streets kept on looking at me.
I gave no damn about them.
I was on my way back home and still saw more people looking at me. My hands reached down for my pocket to keep the coins I had in my hands into it when I discovered that I had no pocket behind my shorts.
My eyes looked down. Yes, I still had my shorts on. But I was too mad to care of how I have put it on. Lots of people have seen it before I did.
I was wearing my shorts facing backwards.
.
.
.
Sayonara, 2007!!!

Drunkenness

All right!!!
I will admit now that up until now I don't get it why people are so after alcohols... I mean the one you drink--not isopropyl alcohol... But as I post this blog, I am actually under (once again) the spell of such curse.
My peer (The Glamsterz) had a Christmas Party a few hours ago and I did not go straight at home (upon seeing the internet cafe, I figured to get a shot of my primary vice).
So it started with the invite and my rejection---saying I want to go to Malate instead on a Saturday. But Mitch had this magical powers which made everyone come even to the time when everyone is unavailable (she has this theory that when an event is not planned, it is accomplished and it works a lot of times to us, honestly).
So I thought that it was time when I had some observation to do; I will document my state of drunkenness to finally figure out what makes alcohols seduce people.
So I took all the shots given to me, keeping myself intact and at the same time, socially performing my skills of conversing. We had three guests besides our gang (as usual, Mark Ryan wasn't able to make it because he was in Cavite). What we talked about is none of your business--just kidding... I'll post it in the coming blogs.
But I noticed that the light drink was kicking in. I was starting to feel a little nauseous--in a good way. Unlike my past drunkenness, this time I was able to keep in mind the feeling that was taking over me (wasted was the time when somebody---whom I really liked----hugged me for a minute but I wasn't in my proper self so I wasn't able to savor the moment). I felt free and any word in my mind was trying to break out of my fucking mind.
I was becoming tactless. But my awareness kept me intact (luckily I was observing myself). Some of my peers, as usual, were harassing me (Yanna actually took off the button of my jeans!!!! I was totally empty with strength!!).
Anyway, I noticed the freedom the alcohol lets you feel when you are under its control. It lets you fly and do whatever you want to do (that's if you're not documenting the feeling like me). It's not the taste that makes you ask for more (Note: alcohols are actually social drugs--which means it is accepted in the society though it creates some effect to the person taking it); it is that feeling of freedom and the feeling of letting everything out of you---the things you weren't able to express, the things you are keeping inside, the things you don't know that exists in you...
You feel so much like you!!!
Of course, our drink was not that hardcore (we did not want to taste shit or vomit a lot for the meantime). But the thing was, it felt very well!!! (Another Note: I am not advertising alcohols and I ain't no drunkard!!!)
As I walked home---here in Washington Street crowded with absence of the citizens---I thought of sharing you guys at least half of what I'm feeling right now because.... I don't know....
I'm so drunk right now so forgive me for the sinful typographical errors. I'm not yet in my total writer-self. I could not think properly. It's also one of my goals right now: to be able to blog while I'm drunk. I once tried it back in November but failed to do it. Somebody who cares got mad at me for being too drunk (whoever it was---hell nobody knows but me!!!).
So whatever else happened in our party shall be posted in the coming blogs (I can't promise when). For now, I am already working on my Summation for 2007. I've already criticized my Summation last year so I'm planning to make it better.....
That's all, guys... I shall sleep on this keyboard for, like, half an hour... good luck to you guysssssajhasklgriuhufdjkhg.........

What a Wednesday

+Wednesday. The scene was very beautiful. There was a huge ship waiting for us at the port. It was almost sunset. I was with my friends as we went up the stairs leading to Doulos, the name of the boat. The wind started to blow hard as we go higher...
+ 6:17PM. Sunday. Osonnie asked me if we were to report for our Philippine Literature class next meeting. I let the spirit of laziness take over me and assumed not. So we did not finish our materials yet. The day came, and yes, we had no chance to report that day. Lucky.
+5:01PM. I've never gone to a huge ship before. The one I would usually take on my way to province wasn't as big as this. We started walking around and finally ended up with a place where there were goods being sold (mostly were books).
+7:32PM. my shoulders and feet were in pain. We had been walking all day long that Wednesday. We were in SM Manila hunting for our presents for our Kris Kringle. We saw Anna, the one whom will be receiving the gift I just bought. And I hid the newly brought present behind me.
+"This is James, Osonnie, Carla and Fule..." Su Jin introduced us to his friend Lucas (not his real name), also a Korean. I was expecting he would say "mother" instead of Fule. Either way, Paulynne was introduced in a funny way.
+8:16PM.The street was dark. Nobody else was with me in this dark walkway in
Taft Avenueand I knew it was very futile to wait for a bus. I had to take a jeepney. Being choosey about Jeepneys, I waited for almost an hour.
+12:04AM. Thursday. My eyes were heavy.
MissionAccomplished. At least, for me. I was online for so many hours just for this report. And still, there are a lot of things to do for school!!!
+12:07AM. The gate in our house was locked. I was locked outside. I knew where the key was supposed to be but it wasn't there!!! With all my ire, I banged the steel gate with all my might. I was really frustrated to go to sleep!! After 20 minutes of banging, I was let in. I stayed up for a few more hours to review. Fucking School.
+6:02PM. The sun was setting. It looked very pretty as it dived into that heavenly horizon of
Manila
Bay. We were at one corner of the ship, hoping to feel okay but we couldn't because at the back of our minds, we knew we had some more obligations for school...
Up until Christmas...

Complaints VS Blessings

"Too much of something is bad enough."
Once upon a time, there was a Nobody who was so bored with his life during his summer vacation (after breaking his motherfucking mobile phone). He missed the school so much. He wanted to do something and thought that school was an answer.
He was wrong.
Because it was a blessing to have something to do. But hell, there was too much to do!!!
So now he was busy on the computer day and night... And he kept his blog filled with his pain about schooling. And the readers are getting tired of reading his complaints. But who cares?!! He had to release those negative energies at something.
----
Tell me I'm a dumbass.
Okay, so let's say that school is our way for success. But does education have to forbid you of being young or at least give you some space for yourself? I don't feel like there is any space left anymore for anything else than studying.
I've been reacting too much about the whole "education" thing. But it just irks me so much when almost all of our professors gave us tasks that will last for, like, the whole Christmas vacation. (take note: CHRISTMAS).
But okay, let's be thankful. I'm blessed with education--being able to be educated is enough to be blessed. Being able to learn and do stuffs is a blessing.
But it's too much!! It's like they expect students to do everything as if we never get tired!! And I'm not blaming only one prof (mind you, Prof M might start pointing at me again--describing me and everything!!!)
.
.
Okay, breathe...*inhale* *exhale*... Nan kuru nai sa..
It's just frustrating that they will take away my Christmas.
Do this and do that... It's too much already.
Yet, I should be thankful to God for giving me the opportunity to study and do something.
They (professors) also have to do it.
To evaluate us. To make us learn. To make us better persons in the future. No, make that the BEST, PERFECT,SMARTEST BEINGS in the world.
Yet, we never experienced our youth. We forgot to love. We forgot who our relatives are. We forgot to socialize. We forgot to breathe. We forgot to live.
We became computers with the best programs in the world, yet we are just machines...
Just machines...

Somebody told me it's almost Christmas

I'm not sure.. Yes, it's already colder now than ever.. It is December... But do you know the feeling that Christmas is not around the corner...
I guess you don't... You're not in my position..
One theory I raised upon such feeling is that it is because I've got lots of things to do--I'm so preoccupied with a lot of school duties that I barely care if it's Christmas already..
Even all of the professors don't recognize Christmas anymore.. They don't get the meaning of 'Christmas Vacation'. They don't even know what 'Vacation' means, I think..
Anyway, so it's almost the day for Simbang Gabi.. I bet you will be seeing them people who are too flashy that they seem to go to a bar or something. But they are merely going to Simbang Gabi ---or what this generation may dub as 'Simbang Porma'.
The essence of Christmas and the sense of going to the church are forgotten. These teenagers go there because they will see their crushes or some new chicks or whatever. Some just come there for the wish they could make upon completing the 9 days. Some would just come there to show up.
Is that how you show you're a Christian? Yuck!!
Anyway, aside from bitching around again and whipping the commoners again with my pointed tongue... I guess you must forgive me because I'm stressed. I'm bombarded with all what I need to suppress into my head.
This will be the first Christmas I will be forgetting about. As the others will be getting ready for some walks and visits and everything 'Christmassy', I hit the books and do my home works.
Busy Christmas for me!!
Fucking System of Education!!!

Schooling rhymes with Frustrations

You have two choices: You let the time pass with nothing to expect but the worse or you make a move and realize you did not do enough.
It was already three in the afternoon and I was supposed to be home already. Instead, I was paper bathing in the library. While the others were seeking for the "Holy Books of Grammar", I was seated with Oso and Carla on one table able to do nothing else but chat amidst the silence of the place. I've never re-validated my Library Card ever since second year (so I still have my old freshman library card and its futility).
After a while, most of my classmates were buzzing around on one table. They were doing something for the class for tomorrow. Upon hearing their frustrated voices, I decided not to inquire about the colloquy. I was getting hints that it had something to do with our frustrating course, Teaching Grammar, so my mind started to flow away from the events taking place around me and chose to live on its own.
But their busy movements and voices were pulling my fleeing consciousness back to the messy and irritating reality: I have to do my homework.
They told me what task they had and I (reluctantly) joined to do what I could to help each and everyone of us. I hope you know that it's not that easy being in Prof M's class.
So now I busily tap on the keyboard---and strangely found some time to post a blog about it---- working on this damned homework. But it pays to know I am ready... or so I hope...
But it hurts when you're already in HER class and she asks questions you are not ready of... especially if all what I've sought upon are not accredited after all those hardships!!!
FRUSTRATING, RIGHT?!!!

Egoism is it?

People would always think I'm nuts, I'm crazy, I’m weird...And I don't see anything wrong with that.. In fact, I also think that I am weird--well, that's looking into the eyes of other people. That's because of the things I say and do, I guess. I know at least how to reflect. But are these people contented with making other people wrong and always bringing themselves up? With the use of other people, most of us try to go higher from where we are right now--even if it means the pain of somebody else.
The problem is, humanity is now on its peek when it comes to egoism. I came to the point in my life when I considered myself egoistic in a lot of ways. And I even planned on doing a blog about it to cite proofs of my egoism. I failed to continue. Because as I observed my everyday I life, I realized that there are actually more people who are more egoistic than I am (you can just imagine how egoistic people are now). As a matter of fact, I recognized some simple everyday acts and sayings that nobody ever thought would turn out egoistic (like the terms "I need you" in romance for example). So I dismissed myself on being egoistic.
Most people are egoistic. And I'm not saying that egoism is something bad at all. I think that there are times that egoism is an asset. But do we really need to view it negative? I guess so.
Anything else I've got to say about these stuffs I shall save for some books I'm planning to write. But for now, try to reflect:
Do you do what you do for really the sake of others or really for your own betterment?

A Concrete Example of Catastrophe

'Catastrophe'... How is this word formed? What words are combined to m ake this word? What's the history of this term?
Those were like the questions our professor was asking before a concrete example came after a few minutes...
We were already in the middle of the 'falling' discussion (falling since we were like losing our performance on Terror Prof M's class) when classmate Lovelyn protested on classmate RC's answer to a question.
I was already dizzy... I took out all the papers I could find in my bag to look for the right answer to our professor's example when suddenly there were moans of anxiety around me. I thought Lovelyn said something wrong with her outburst of knowledge. But I heard Marielle mentioned the word "lindol" (earthquake) and I looked out of the window.
The open window, in which one of the airconditioner is placed with some wooden wall to support it, was shaking back and forth.
I felt it. There was an earthquake.
I felt glad to feel it--because I was excited with feeling its action. Call me mean but I did not wish any harm on anyone.. It's just that it felt fun during that moment when I felt like the whole earth was swaying me in its hammock. I could even fall asleep...
But it lasted only a few seconds. Bitin.
Our professor, ever so calm, told us to go out of the building. Luckily, her type of seating arrangement fits such situation; we all got out easily. And it was a good thing we were downstairs near the main door of the building. We joined the other people gathered beside the field of the university.
Bitin.
We were walking as I tried to hold all the papers I've taken out of my bag during class. The papers fell as I walked and I felt really stupid. At least the earthquake was done. No time to haste, I guess.
Bitin.

I Let the Burglar In

Last wednesday, right before the Pageant, I left the house around six twenty in the morning... unconscious of the crime about to take place in our very home....
I was waiting in my usual position for the bus with the skate board in my hands.
At home, I was unaware that this small, thin and strange man entered our compound and managed to get into my grandmother's home. My grandmother was there, lying on the sofa, taking a short nap with her back on the sight of the thief.
I was so annoyed because, as always, the PVP Liner Bus hasn't arrived yet. It would always be like that. Maybe the drivers are lazy. But I should've thought of the door I left open when I left the house. But I wasn't aware that a thief managed to go upstairs and spy on the sleeping people in the bedrooms.
He could not come any closer. He feared of getting caught. He was in too deep now. So, he thought of grabbing the first thing that comes to his hands: some old shoes.
My brother went in and went into the bathroom. He noticed some figure rushing out of the house. But he wasn't able to figure who it was.
The thief left our house with some pair of old shoes in his sinful fingers. And he should've thanked me for opening the door for him.
He should've thanked my stupidity.
Because I was there, knowing nothing about my fault. I found a bus and was very thankful I was going to make it on time at school. But that grace worth three old shoes...
By the way, last week, somebody just stole our bicycle; the fifth of its kind to be stolen from us.
Damn...

Drastic Tuesday with Mrs. M PART 2

continuation...

And so, Ma'am M came in our classroom (if you have no idea who she is, try reading my other blog posts--like THE DROP and MONDAYS and THURSDAYS).
She went in with what seemed to all of us as a good mood. But you know the weather...
It rains..
Then the sun glares later on...
And then it pours hard after a few fours....
I saw her sit at the table in front and started calling names with the classcards already on her hands...
Everything went well until.... "Fule,...Gagaoin,....GUTING...."
I wasn't called!!! Everyone had eyes on me with shock. But Ma'am M went on. I saw Candy mouthed something. I consulted my bag and found out that my classcard was still in my notebook.
Panic time: Ma'am M doesn't like latecomers.
I stood up and saw what seemed like a reflection opposite me as I approached the table; Joanne, our class president, also forgot to pass her card.
"Ma'am," I said, in a nervous tone, "I forgot to..." I couldn't make up the sentences...
Ma'am M looked up at the two of us. Then, she looked down and moaned, "You're doing it again...." She was on the verge of getting mad.
I've never learned my lesson!!!
"Get out," she advised to the two of us, "find a new professor for the two of you."
Joanne and I reluctantly sat back on our seats. We did not leave the room though. And I was fingering my bag, preparing to pick it up in case Ma'am M shouts at us to leave.
THE LUCKY PART (Ironically): She returned the cards for us to write something on the back. This time, upon returning these, we get to join the cards as we hand it back to her, and join the long semester of new pains and sacrifices (oh, and learnings).
Well, I can't imagine anybody else teaching this course better than she does... So it's worth being lucky I guess...

Drastic Tuesday with Mrs. M

+Today, Tuesday, Second day of class this semester, It was a drizzling. was waiting for the bus to come while worrying---I'm going to be late for my first class. PVP Buses are so lazy and always late!!!
+Yesterday, Monday, Ms. H told us that she wouldn't orient on the first day because there will always be some people who are still absent after the vacation (break). In this way, she wouldn't be repeating all she will eb saying to each of us.
+This Morning, first class, I got almost on time. There were only a few of us in the classroom. The professor, Mrs. G., was there already. Then some of my classmates came. Then, came Von, late.
Mrs. G said, "This will be the first and last time that you will be late in this class. I don't know if I'm still going to accept you if you come late next time in this class. Huwag kang magulat if I tell you to 'don't come to my class on time'. I mean to say, you should come before the time."
Then, came Cherry... Another late student...
I thought I experienced a de ja vu when Mrs. G. said,
Mrs. G: "This will be the first and last time that you will be late in this class. I don't know if I'm still going to accept you if you come late next time in this class. Huwag kang magulat if I tell you to 'don't come to my class on time'. I mean to say, you should come before the time." Cherry took her seat.
Then, came Jobelle...
Mrs. G: "This will be the first and last time that you will be late in this class. I don't know if I'm still going to accept you if you come late next time in this class. Huwag kang magulat if I tell you to 'don't come to my class on time'. I mean to say, you should come before the time."
Then another classmate came, Mrs G: "This will be the first and last time that you will be late in this class. I don't know if I'm still going to accept you if you come late next time in this class. Huwag kang magulat if I tell you to 'don't come to my class on time'. I mean to say, you should come before the time."
I was beginning to memorize the refrain when another, and another came to class late.. And it went on, like a memorized prayer or chant: "This will be the first and last time that you will be late in this class. I don't know if I'm still going to accept you if you come late next time in this class. Huwag kang magulat if I tell you to 'don't come to my class on time'. I mean to say, you should come before the time."
Then, lastly, Ava arrived... I felt like a fortune-teller for the first time when I predicted the lined Mrs. G mentioned: "This will be the first and last time that you will be late in this class. I don't know if I'm still going to accept you if you come late next time in this class. Huwag kang magulat if I tell you to 'don't come to my class on time'. I mean to say, you should come before the time."
Oh, and one more thing: She's not strict, she's just straight. She's cool (but really strict, I guess)!!
+I bought a foot-long hotdog and an iced tea for my ten o'clock lunch.
+The Climax of the day came... Mrs. M arrived on our class as our professor again.... and I was the first one to irritate her this time...
to be continued...

My Nerdy Sembreak

After all of the hardships of the first sem (and some fun after the enrollment), I decided to take the rest of the week relaxing and worrying of nothing--no school burdens for now!!! ^_^
It was Tuesday, third day of freedom, when somebody knocked at my bedroom door. I rushed out, expecting somebody from our family would go in but surprisingly, it was Mark. He dropped by after going to his own enrollment. Afterwards, I was accused by him of doing a self-service. I denied it. And we went on with some stories.
"What have you been up to these days?" He asked.
"These..." I showed him all the books, notebooks and a clearbook laid beside me and I realized how nerdy I had been.
"Oh. That's pretty boring," he claimed to which I half agreed upon.
But for me, it had been normal. It was my way of passing the time besides going to the mall and surfing the net. I had been reading and writing all day.
WHAT:
+ "Lord of the Flies" by William Golding - I heard that this is a very cool book (besides the fact that it is a reference for the movie Battle Royale, which is one of my favorites) so I started reading it.
+ "NIHONGO NO DOKUGOKU" - I'm still in the process of studying the Japanese Language (and I've learned a lot so far). There are still a lot to learn about... and I had to enrich my vocabulary so I bought myself a new dictionary. THIS IS WHAT I CALL STUDYING WITH PASSION!!!
+ THE CLEARBOOK- The clearbook Mark saw was my collection of drawings. I draw when I'm in the mood of doing so.

So much for the papers around me. But to think, as opposed to how terrible I go in school, I'm not driven into the mood of frustrations and worries. I read Golding's novel without thinking of how to analyze the novel and how I would do with it on a term paper. But actually, the analysis activates automatically (maybe due to practice at school). And I go on a step by step process with my studies on Nihongo, not frustrating myself too much nor forcing myself to hasten anything!!! And, I somehow lend this day, wednesday, to any school purposes like planning my Demo Teaching and practicting some "foresight". I must expect the worst for this coming sem for all the heavy courses awaiting us.
With all the books and papers (plus a computer), aren't I nerdy this sembreak? Does this mean I miss schoolwork??
Somehow, yeah, I do.
NERD! NERD! NERD!
^_^

Examination is an Evil Word

"Okay class, we will have our final exam on (date)."
"Now, get (size of paper)."
"Please answer the following..."


These are the usual sentences and phrases that startle us everytime the teacher mentions them. Why do we get scared?
Because we aren't sure of passing the exam the teacher is about to give.
I am one of those who get really tensed everytime the teacher says such words (though sometimes I get confident to do the exam for I want to exercise my learnings.)
But, how about the teacher giving the test? Do we know how s/he feels?
This afternoon, we went to one school here in Makati to give some examination (which we made by ourselves) for a third year high school class. This is for our Assessment and Evaluation course in which we are required to test the validity of our exam (and all that blah-blah-blah's).
Before giving it, we (me and my groupmates) have undergone all the hardships just to make our examination possible to answer.
And so, as we went in, the class (a pilot section) greeted us and we gave them the papers one by one (because we had technical problems with our test papers.)
And right there and then, I figured: “Giving students an examination seems like giving them needles to chew.” I’m sort of exaggerating actually, but I could see their reactions—and add the fact that we were handing every page one by one to them (there were actually seven pages.) Imagine how many needles they chewed!!!!!
And as I stood in front, I could see who is cheating and who is already done (but too shy to give the paper to us—for, maybe, he thinks we are going to read his answers.) And when I turned to my groupmates, they were also looking at the students.
We were like gargoyles looking down upon humans as they suffer.
Now, I could feel how “evil” the students would think of you if you give them test papers to ink on. Even the way they look up on us, they seem to glare at us.
What could they have had in mind?
“This exam is crashing my brain, you bullshits.”
“Curse you for giving such difficult questions.”
“What the hell are you asking me about??? I did not read such thing all my life!!!”

There could be thousands of thoughts against us... Well, there were some who were understanding though. And believe me, it pained me to watch them do the exam myself.
But the realization here actually is that no matter what, we have to do this. There are reasons why a teacher has to give exams. And this is not to annoy students, because teachers also WORK SO HARD with exams…. You just don’t know how much we do to finish the exam. It’s a part of what the teacher need to do: to assess the student’s knowledge and skills about what they have already learn.
So, I’m very thankful for their cooperation; though a lot of them failed or almost failed which would also lead, probably, to the invalidity of our exam!!!

GMA dubs Death Note: What the Fuck?!!!

I've just read this from one forum and I got teary-eyed--because of the humor and annoyance it was bringing me at the same time!!!As a big fan of Death Note, I am reacting upon this 'pambababoy' that they are doing upon this anime...
I am actually anti-dubbed animes (though I have no choice when I watch animes in Animax with some weird accents.) and this is going too far for GMA to ruin such a very excellent anime....
Here is the line-up of upcoming dubbers so you would join my grief:
'DENNIS TRILLO just signed up a contract to do the voice of YAGAMI LIGHT.REINER CATILLO as L LAWLIET/RYUUZAKIJOLINA MAGDANGAL as MISA AMANEMARVIN AGUSTIN as MIHAEL KEEHL/MELLOPATRICK GARCIA as NEAR/NATE RIVERJENNYLYN MERCADO as NAOMI MISORAYASMIN CURDY as KYOMI TAKADA MIKE 'PEKTO' NACU as TOTA MATSUDAKEEMPEE DE LEON as RYUKBERTING LABRA as WATARIUnder negotiation pa si MIKE ENRIQUEZ as the SAKURA TV DIRECTOR. '

Terrible....
What happened to LIGHT and L?!!!! OMG!!! And RYUK?!!!! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!
This is, for them, the powerhouse cast of dubbers and for me, the craziest cast of dubbers ever!!! I have nothing against these stars.. Let's day that. Yeah, they do well in acting (I hope) and they are good-looking (I still hope) but to have them as dubbers of Death Note to make it more exciting... I don't think so....
Death Note does not need any commercialization because I believe it can do well alone without such dubbers... They may have some dubbers (which I really hope they would screen well on who FITS each character's voice) and it will be fine with me--as long as they make sure these chosen dubbers are competitive....
But still, I'm in favor of the REAL DUBBERS of Death Note... And I won't mind if GMA tagalizes this anime---as long as this is not the line up, they won't cut any scene, they translate well and hire competitive dubbers instead of commercialized celebrities.

School made me a Zombie

I was already on bed. I've decided to sleep finally after reviewing so many stuffs for tomorrow's class and exams.
But I just couldn't sleep. I really have to do something. Just when I was so ready to sleep, the ghost of my studies and obligations kept on haunting me and I just can't sleep until I go in front of the computer and do my job(s).
So here I am, finishing some business with my eyes half closed, half sleeping...
Listening to Suga Shikao as I hit the keyboard...
Trying to amuse myself once in a while by surfing (because doing my homework tends to be really boring....)
And I will then try my best to go to sleep tonight... Or so at least I hope...
Because the thought of tomorrow--school day, homeworks, exams, demo teachings---it keeps me from being under my comfortable blanket and my fat soft pillow....
DARN!!
I am totally bombarded with all these obligations!!!
I pity myself---I pity myself a lot!!! I am beginning to become thinner (I don't even know how it could still happen since I thought I'm already too thin to become so) and my eyes are in deep hollows... My veins are exposed from the skin of my hands and arms... Pale has my skin color become...
All is left to do is for me to sleep walk...
Or anything else... be confined.. due to overfatigue.. so that I can be a living (or not anymore living) proof of how college exaggerates its duty of educating students...
Well, I have to stop complaining.... As I've read from an article, I don't have to say that "I have to" because it's making my sentence a little negative.. Because it seems to say that I am just obliged to do these...
So now I will say "I want to"...
I want to finish all these home works!!!
I want to finish college!!!
I want to do well in my class!!
I want to learn!!I want to sleep now!!!---please let me sleep and quit telling me that I HAVE TO DO GOOD!!!

English Majors: Attitude Problems

English Majors are boastful and arrogant...

Really??

It has been a common misconception that most English Majors (particularly in our campus) are boastful and arrogant. And right now most professors in our department (English Department) are probably getting such feedbacks---that we have attitude problem.
I beg to disagree.... slightly... about such hasty generalization.
The first thing that came to my mind is that most other majors consider our Way of speaking English as showy and haughty. Because they may say that when we speak in English, we sound as if we're showing off what we know about the language--which I guess is not a problem if you are really good at it (unless you're becoming really showy about it.) But come on, it's our forte--our majorship---for crying out loud!! Aren't we suppose to put such skill into practice?!
And we aren't even turning our backs to our mother language (My gang at school even have this momentary check on deep Tagalog words that we know and share it to each other.)
Secondly, we are victims of hasty generalizations.Maybe, one time, an 'other-major' student met a group of English majors who are acting as if they are the only 'children of God'. So they may perhaps come up with one generalization (without further observation and study) that all of us are like that.
I might start thinking that they don't have any idea what individualization is.
I am not doing this write up to defend our majorships. I don't even know much of the other English majors in our club (English Club--where all English Majors are members.) I am just trying to say a little about our side---because other majors seem to speak against us (and that, my friend, is just my hasty generalization. How do you like that??? Provoking, ain't it?)
How about if I see a couple of Psychology Majors having sex inside classrooms... is it okay to say that all Psych Majors do that in the campus? Or if I see some Physics Majors taking illegal drugs...wouldn't it be unfair to say that all Physics Majors are drug addicts?? Aren't those too mean to say??? Of course, these are just examples---no fact about such. But isn't it painful for you to hear such generalization when you yourself is not like that?
And I'm not saying we don't have attitude problems. Of course, I guess, we do!! Nobody's perfect!! But I don't find much of them (attitude problematic students) in my section... Maybe some... But nobody so offensive... I don't know about the other sections.
Personally, I believe I have attitude problems. But I am certain that these problems I have about myself don't affect the image of every English Majors.
Because I am just myself. It is just me... And I do no intentions of ruining our image.
So maybe not all English majors have attitude problems..
Maybe several of us have... But not all, I believe so..
NOT ALL.
So before you judge other people's attitude, see first if your own ass is already free from shit stains.

the One with the Skirt

I barely feel embarrassed. And this one is just one of those rare moments.
My friends and I were walking outside Ayala Mall and I figured to go to the bathroom for a while. There were comfort rooms beside a Loading Station. I told my friends to wait for me so I went in the bathroom to the left.
It was very clean and it made me wonder why there weren’t any urinal hanging on any wall of the bathroom. I just went in one cubicle bathed with the clean sight of the room and its silence for I was alone.
Somebody came in and went into the other cubicle.
I was done and went out of the cubicle. Before I go out, I inspected myself in front of the mirror and wondered why there was a janitress coming out of the other cubicle.
A janitress? Maybe she's about to close the public bathroom. I didn't mind her looking at me with hostility.
I went out of the room and found my friends waiting for me outside. Mitch asked me, "Why did you come from there?"
Huh? What is she asking me?
She broke it into me: "You've just gone into the one with the skirt."
Her voice was an epiphany. A disastrous epiphany, I tell you. I felt like shrinking then because I found the door with a silhouette drawing of a man closed at the right side.
And I have just gone into the female's bathroom!!
I have just been into the door with the drawing that had no skirt on.
My friends laughed at me (How helpful they were!!). I invited them quickly to get ourselves (especially me) out of sight for there were a lot of witnesses: the janitress, the cigarette vendor on one side, and even the passengers of the jeepney beside the place saw me went in!!!
Lucky I was alone in the bathroom----that would be a greater humiliation!!!
Next time, I have to consider first if I were wearing any skirt--then, I can really go in and not encounter a janitress who felt like killing me!!

The Drop 2

I remember clearly how it felt like when I fell in line for a roller coaster ride for the first time. I was excited and nervous at the same time.
And you're getting tired of me talking about this Roller Coaster ride I'm having in school.
Anyway, I fell in line last saturday at the office of Prof M, hoping to ride some coaster then receiving the Blessed Apology. We waited for hours and finally she came.
I was second in line.
I remember that this is going to be the second time I will be talking to her one-on-one inside that office. My first time was when I was interviewed by her during the Majorship Qualifications.
It took my friend a long time to get out. As we, the others, waited outside, we were hearing some of the tensed conversation going on inside. It just added up our nervousness--my nervousness.
And finally, my friend came out. My turn. I went in and Prof M asked what my purpose for coming.And I spilled out some apology. And so, the coaster took another drop and it was a terrible thing that I was just standing there with nothing to grip on.
The rest of the conversation will not be posted here. Let's say that it's a discussion which can only be talked about in that room. All I can say is that, I went out feeling a little relieved.
But who ever said that everything ends there. I have the feeling it will be the first of everything else....


By the way, on my way home, she took the same bus as I did.

The Drop

If you can still remember one of my current posts from my Anything But Ordinary Blog, I mentioned about starting the new school year with some "threat" which I compared with riding a roller coaster...
Okay, to help you remember, it was about being under the most strict professor in our university. And now that we (me and my block section) are undergoing some painful researches and compilations---we didn't have any idea that we would soon be arriving at The Drop of the coaster ride.
If you were very adventurous, you would definitely be very excited to ride a coaster and experience the overwhelming Drop. But to most people, it is very nerve-racking indeed.
But I kept telling myself to be calm (as stoic as I've always been.)
Now I'm not going to say more about this latest issue in our class (for some confidential matter) but all i can say is that there had been (or there is still) a problem with our teacher-student relationship and on top of all, our communication skills.
Now our professor does not want to talk to us anymore unless we talk to her personally and apologize if we've said something behind her back or say that our conscience is clean---that we never cursed her even once.
The scences that are occuring right now are not actually new to me--regardless of the great intensity of this Drop is affecting me.
We wrote some letter to that professor but we ended up listening to the long painful cermon. Its similar scene: Our "bribery" (allegedly) to Sir 'Don't-Fuck-With-Me' and of course his useless cermon to us in his office last semester. The difference is that our professor right now is more serious and smarter and more worth saying sorry to...
Another similar scene is the lesson they were having this afternoon in the office of Prof. M (Our Roller Coaster Professor that I'm talking about now). There were only a few students allowed in the class---those students who have already received the Blessed Apology. This reminds me of Sir Jarder back in highschool on my junior year. He also did the same to our class (though I was then part of the students who received the Blessed Apology.)


Now, I have no idea how it will end up. I'm preparing myself on accomplishing my apology. And I am so hoping she would accept that (because I really have no grudge on her.)
But first, let me get a good grip on my myself as the coaster rushes on another drop.....

Nan Kuru Nai Sa - Prologue: Flying Cigarettes

Anything may happen while you're out of your consciousness whether you're sleeping or daydreaming. You may even experience some weird things which are not actually weird at all, let's say, a flying cigarette.
It happened when I was walking one night on my way home. My mind, as usual, was into another dimension. When my mind is doing all (and I mean ALL) the talking, I call it a process in which my mind is "buzzing". So as my mind went buzzing (probably debating on some issue or trying to remember some unimportant information), I wasn't aware that a 'flying cigarette' was going my way. It landed between my toes. But because my mind was busy with other things, I kept on walking. Okay, well, I slightly reacted with a "Ah, shit!!" and a man standing at a door apologized for throwing that 'flying cigarette'. He didn't really mean it, I guess. And it didn't really burned my toes. It hurt a bit though.
So, in order to stop talking too much in my mind, I'm going back to blogging. This is my chance once more to enhance my skills in writing (and typing) and my use of our second language as well as my chance on putting these words on something else than my noisy mind.
Anyway, my name is James. If you've read my past blog posts, you are probably annoyed with how preachy I've been and how dark my posts were. Don't worry, I'm planning to go light right now. However, it does not mean that I will quit talking about the stuffs I hate the most--that's nature to me. My blog had been a catharsis. It's where I get to express some of those unexpressed especially in anger. DARN! Stop me from talking about these stuffs again...
Well, anyway, join me on my journey with life and my enemy: the rotten society. Let me just say that posting a blog is not always about letting people know what is cool, what is nice, fun, but YOU PEOPLE must also see the dark side of things, the negative, the uncool, the disgusting faces of life for you to be able to be familiar with such stuffs.
Because knowing only what's right does not get you anywhere--it is in knowing what's wrong that leads us to getting things right.
So, let's get started. Let's kick some ass!!!

Epilogue: Anything But Ordinary

The sun sets again. An employee and then another finished work. A song ended playing on air. Another TV show says farewell. Jeepneys and taxis and more varieties of vehicles reached their destinations and finally stopped moving. A game is finally over. Children in the streets quit playing games. The store closes. Lights in bedrooms turned off one by one.
It is very common to feel sadness on Endings of whatever story. We would not know anymore what happens next, that's why kind writers created "Happy Endings" to assure their audience that everything else after the story would go on fine and okay. But still, it's sad to know that something will not be around anymore because it is going to end.
Leaving my teenage years will be a nice step to maturity. Some of my friends would tell me that I'm old---let me say this: I'm just older than them. Everyone will reach this stage (unless one dies early.) And you will probably get the same treatment from younger ones.
It is not only that I am ending my teenage years. I'm also ending my 'Anything But Ordinary' life. This is the life I lived for so many years: A life I used to consider insipid and ordinary. But growing up and having the time to look back, I realize how adventurous it had been. And it is by being ordianary did I became as somebody now.
I've become somebody by being a nobody. I tasted pain and liked it. I got rejected and moved on. Being nobody for me have felt like being somebody for myself and for the people around me. I have been whining while unconciously I was becoming something people talked about, someone people liked or disliked or hated, someone whom people criticize and someone whom people try to bring down.
I am somebody.
So, I end up complaining about how it had been an ordinary life for me. Because it is always up to us to paint the portrait of our life. As my former Rizal Professor would always tell us: "Life is what you make it." And indeed by being myself did I make something out of it.
Now that I take a big step forward, I'm sure there will be new challenges to face. It's natural. And problems are what keeps me up everyday. Without problems, my life will be dull. The problem with problems is that we worry about it too much and it just complicate things more. And I bet these will be testing me on how strong I am now. These problems will just make me bolder--it will be a path to invinsibility. If I give up or don't win on this, I'll be damned more than ever.
It's life. Go with the flow. But we may go against it if it is not making us happy anymore. And you may always find out how strong you've become by doing so. You'll find what beauty it is in the other side of this Current.
You'll find freedom.
And the sun will rise again. People will wake up and get to work. Vehicles will fill the traffic. Children will be on the streets again and stores open for customers. Songs begin to play once more. You shall continue walking this complicated life.
... This will be my last post for this blog. Because there will be no ordinary person to update it. It will be no "Anything But Ordinary" anymore. No more to read about that Ordinary Person. Because he's gone.
And I shall be walking this other path now. The path far away from where the Current used to bring me to. And there's no stopping me.
"The day which we fear as our last is but the birthday of eternity. "
~Seneca

Mondays and Thursdays

I thought I have already prepared much of myself for this school year that came.
I was wrong.
I thought evrything would go on as it is in my Second Year college and that there is nothing worse.
I was wrong.
I though I've been handled by the most terror teachers in all of my schools.
kuso, chigaimasu!!!
And as I sat in the air-conditioned classroom that Thursday afternoon, I tried my best not to feel the nervousness that I may feel once the professor I expected would announce that she is going to be our professor for the whole sem. Even as she walked into the classroom my mind was just blank and it suddenly felt to me as if I were in a Roller Coaster Ride preparing to take off.
I wonder how the drop of the Coaster would be like.
Yes.. It is now confirmed that Ma'am M. is going to handle our class. If you're not aware of who she is, she is just the most strict (terror I might add) in the whole campus.
Being a PNUan, meeting Alumni and Alumnae (and even other co-sutdents) outside or inside the campus, they would ask me, or us, if we already have Her as our professor. She's that phenomenal.
Anyway, based on my observation she is always righteous with her shouts and anger--she always got a good point about it and it impressed me actually. She reasons out pretty well, even telling us that she is not the one who makes us frightened rather we ourselves build our own fear upon her.
Maybe, because it is so obvious that she just wants us to do exactly what she wants and that she wants us to use our common sense most of the time. Overall, I'm beginning to like her--I don't know if it is due to fear or amazement or both.
But the thing that just had my head aching this whole day was the requirements she told us.
Mountains of works.
Okay, so now I have to carry a lot of burden---considering this is not the only subject we got. Well, good luck!!!
Right now that I can't predict anything, I think all is left to do is work hard on it. Bottom line: Do as she says.

Bloody Satisfaction

Have you ever been bullied in your life?
I don't think it is something bad that happens to one's life though it is something done bad to one's life. I guess my very first encounter with bullies was back then when I was in 4th grade and I got assigned to be in the 'Star Section'. Of course, it was a different world for me and damn right it was. I admit that I was really a dork back then when I was younger. And because of that, people would take advantage of me; of my innocence, of my kindness and of my patience.
I vividly remember this guy I'll name here as 'N'. He had been annoying me for the whole school year; laughing at the stuffs I do, making fun of me and sometimes, of my family. He should be thankful I was kind that time or else he already knows what Hell is all about.
One time, he asked me to take of my eyeglasses. As I did so, he told me to put them back on because, he said, I look like shit.

There were also some people who considered me crazy. But the fact is that they were beyond my reach; not because they were smart or rich or anything but because their pride are held up too high. Too high. tsk tsk tsk...

And so, I went on with my life. I went to high school and improved a little though you just can't simply take the word 'dork' off me. Some people would make fun of me and I just kept silent... avoiding any fight--which right now I regret a lot!!! I could've taught them a lesson. But don't worry, time will come... I'll be able to get my payback.

"You just don't look like you belong to the speech choir," said one white classmate of mine to me. She said I didn't fit the choir because I don't look good in it.

While going home after a party a few months from now, Mr. Sex-is-what-I'm-all-about told me, " Stop acting the way you are or else I'll give you a punch that will send you bones flying out into Africa." Okay, so that was very offending, considering that he used to be my bestfriend in high school. It just make me laugh though for his poor choice of words especially that I don't see the relevance of Africa in our conversation. Before he say stuffs about me, I might as well kick his ass of this country and send his guts to Jupiter and his bones to Egypt and his rotten soul to hell. Maybe he'll still be able to find more sex in there, although I think he will never feel pleasure ever again.

What do i want to point out in this entry. Well, it's just simple. Let's not mess other people's lives if we don't want ours to be messed afterward. Anger should not be an emotion kept inside--it erupts on perfect timing. And no matter what, it will seek for revenge.
A revenge to heal these wounds. And revenge is a euphoric satisfaction--especially for me.
And you may be wondering about my second sentence in this entry--that it's not really a bad happening in life to be bullied. It's not for me, because it taught me a lot of lessons. It made me grow and become a stronger person.
I've become immune with pain.
So it didn't make my life bad. It's going to make their lives miserable. Because I'm not what I used to be. I now found myself.

And revenge satisfies me.