Bloody Satisfaction

Have you ever been bullied in your life?
I don't think it is something bad that happens to one's life though it is something done bad to one's life. I guess my very first encounter with bullies was back then when I was in 4th grade and I got assigned to be in the 'Star Section'. Of course, it was a different world for me and damn right it was. I admit that I was really a dork back then when I was younger. And because of that, people would take advantage of me; of my innocence, of my kindness and of my patience.
I vividly remember this guy I'll name here as 'N'. He had been annoying me for the whole school year; laughing at the stuffs I do, making fun of me and sometimes, of my family. He should be thankful I was kind that time or else he already knows what Hell is all about.
One time, he asked me to take of my eyeglasses. As I did so, he told me to put them back on because, he said, I look like shit.

There were also some people who considered me crazy. But the fact is that they were beyond my reach; not because they were smart or rich or anything but because their pride are held up too high. Too high. tsk tsk tsk...

And so, I went on with my life. I went to high school and improved a little though you just can't simply take the word 'dork' off me. Some people would make fun of me and I just kept silent... avoiding any fight--which right now I regret a lot!!! I could've taught them a lesson. But don't worry, time will come... I'll be able to get my payback.

"You just don't look like you belong to the speech choir," said one white classmate of mine to me. She said I didn't fit the choir because I don't look good in it.

While going home after a party a few months from now, Mr. Sex-is-what-I'm-all-about told me, " Stop acting the way you are or else I'll give you a punch that will send you bones flying out into Africa." Okay, so that was very offending, considering that he used to be my bestfriend in high school. It just make me laugh though for his poor choice of words especially that I don't see the relevance of Africa in our conversation. Before he say stuffs about me, I might as well kick his ass of this country and send his guts to Jupiter and his bones to Egypt and his rotten soul to hell. Maybe he'll still be able to find more sex in there, although I think he will never feel pleasure ever again.

What do i want to point out in this entry. Well, it's just simple. Let's not mess other people's lives if we don't want ours to be messed afterward. Anger should not be an emotion kept inside--it erupts on perfect timing. And no matter what, it will seek for revenge.
A revenge to heal these wounds. And revenge is a euphoric satisfaction--especially for me.
And you may be wondering about my second sentence in this entry--that it's not really a bad happening in life to be bullied. It's not for me, because it taught me a lot of lessons. It made me grow and become a stronger person.
I've become immune with pain.
So it didn't make my life bad. It's going to make their lives miserable. Because I'm not what I used to be. I now found myself.

And revenge satisfies me.